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Update: Aryeh Goodman

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A preliminary hearing was held Wednesday, February 20th, regarding Aryeh Goodman in Pike County criminal court.

The hearing was attended by friends and family in support of the survivor. The specific details that transpired within the courtroom are not of public record at this time.

However, it is known that a preliminary ruling by Pike County Magistrate, Deborah Fischer, found that the D.A. had provided enough evidence to proceed on all twelve counts of indecent assault on a minor under the age of 13 albeit the attempts of the defense counsel to have 8 of the charges dropped.

Each count carries a maximum sentence of 5 years.


Salford assault suspect has breached bail

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By Jonathan Kalmus, February 22, 2013

A Salford Jewish man accused of sexual assault against children is suspected of breaching his bail conditions to avoid his upcoming trial.

Greater Manchester Police have confirmed that Todros Grynhaus, 47, from Higher Broughton, has failed to answer strict bail conditions he was placed under following being charged with historic sexual abuse in December.

At a magistrate’s preliminary hearing in January, Mr Grynhaus pleaded not guilty to six counts of indecent assault and one count of sexual assault against three minors, who were all under 15 at the time.

Mr Gynhaus was ordered to surrender his passport for fear he might flee before his trial, expected to take place later this year. But a previous condition to report to a Salford police station every Wednesday was relaxed to allow him to visit his family in London.

Manchester police said: “He has failed to reside at his designated bail address and therefore breached his conditions. Inquiries are ongoing to establish his whereabouts and anyone with information should phone police on 101 or the independent charity Crimestoppers, anonymously, on 0800 555 111″.

Man Arrested for Incest with Daughter

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Pay attention; this happens in our community too.

(Memphis) Police arrested a man for allegedly having sex with his 11-year-old daughter, after her mother found disturbing entries in the girl’s diary.

In order to protect the identity of the victim, News Channel 3 will not be showing the name or face of her father, who is now in jail.

Experts said that unfortunately, child sexual abuse often happens with a member of the family or adult family friend, making it even more difficult for a child to speak up.

“They don’t know what the result will be of disclosing abuse. They don’t know what will happen to them. Sometimes the offender will say things to scare the child,” said Dr. Randy Schnell, director of the Memphis City Schools Mental Health Center.

Dr. Schnell recommends parents have an open line of communication with their children. He said that parents should watch for sudden changes, like if the child becomes angrier, starts to misbehave more often, or becomes very withdrawn.

“Sometimes children express their experiences in writing assignments at school,” he said.

The victim of this most recent case wrote about the incidents in her diary, dating them between January 13th and February 3rd.

If parents suspect strange behavior, they should ask the child what’s wrong, without asking leading questions about specific incidents.

Experts, like people at the Memphis Child Advocacy Center or the Rape Crisis Center, are trained in how to interview children who have been abused.

The Memphis Child Advocacy Center also has training for people to learn how to identify child abuse.

Christina Underhill attended one of the three-hour training sessions more than a year ago. She felt so strongly about it, she became a volunteer for the center.

During the session, Underhill said “they also play some very poignant videos of adults who are former child victims of sexual abuse. And in their words, they go through the situation they went through, how they felt. And how important they felt it would have been for any other adult in their life to have spoken up.”

She learned to talk early, and talk often, to her children, even if the topic is uncomfortable.

“If you don’t feel comfortable talking to mom and dad, you can talk to your aunt or uncle. Or go to grandma.”

She said it’s important to talk to children about good touch versus bad touch, and how it is ok to say ‘no’ to an adult.

 

News3 Natasha Chen

 

Witness refuses to testify against popular rabbi

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TheTimesOfIsrael BY Asher Zeiger and Aaron Kalman

One of the two witnesses set to testify against Rabbi Motti Elon, who is on trial for sexual harassment, refused to take the stand Tuesday, forcing the prosecution to drop half of the charges against him at the final stages of the court case.

Elon was indicted on two counts of indecent and sexual assault against two 17-year-old male students between 2003 and 2005, when he was head of Yeshivat Hakotel in Jerusalem’s Old City.

The reluctant witness, who was a minor when Elon allegedly harassed him, wouldn’t face his former teacher in court, Channel 10 reported, citing both fear and heavy pressure from friends and family as the reasons for his sudden change of heart.

“Toward the end of the prosecution’s case against Rabbi Elon, and after an extended period during which we attempted to bring the complainant to court so he could testify, it became clear to the prosecution that the complainant had made up his mind not to testify,” the Jerusalem district prosecution told the Hebrew news channel.

“It was decided not to force him to appear [in court], and, as a result, the prosecution had to retract a second charge being pressed,” the statement said.

Elon — a popular rabbi and educator — was indicted in November. Throughout the proceedings, the rabbi has maintained his innocence, claiming that he may have kissed and hugged students, but it was to console or encourage them, and was never done in a sexual manner.

Both of the alleged victims claimed that they turned to Elon during a time of personal crisis. The first, known as “Aleph,” was not Elon’s student, but was experiencing an emotional crisis when a friend suggested he speak with rabbi. “Aleph” claimed that, on two separate occasions, Elon hugged him, had him lie down on his stomach, then kissed and caressed him. Elon claimed that he didn’t even recall meeting “Aleph.” He said that if they did meet, it is conceivable that he kissed “Aleph” as a means of consolation, but not for sexual gratification.

The second student, “Bet,” claimed that Elon placed his foot between his legs, had him sit on his knees, hugged him, patted him on the stomach and knees, and kissed him on the face.

Both “Aleph” and “Bet” said that Elon recited the ‘priestly blessing’ after his acts.

At one time, Elon was considered to be one of the most prominent of the new generation of leaders within the national religious camp. He was the head of Horev Yeshiva high school from 1987 until 2002, at which time he was named head of Yeshivat Hakotel, where he remained until 2006. He is the son of late Supreme Court justice Menachem Elon, and brother of former MK Benjamin (Benny) Elon and of Beersheba District Court judge Yoseph Elon.

Sexual Abuse Victim Demeaned and Put on Notice for Misconduct at Hebrew Theological College

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Hebrew Theological College Dean Doctor Esther Shkop demeans student survivor of sexual abuse and puts her on notice for having the audacity to talk about her experience. Kaylie* (a pseudonym) courage is to be applauded. The college’s actions are outrageous.

Kaylie*, an 18 year old College student in Chicago had recently posted this image on her Facebook page with this caption:

goingpublic

“I’m a survivor of sexual abuse.

This is not a new thing. I’ve been a survivor as long as you’ve known me.

Are you going to change your opinion of me just because three evil people took advantage of me?

Are you embarrassed of me? Are you willing to share our story?

Let’s see who my real friends are.”

Just a few hours ago, Kaylie* received the attached email from one of the dean’s at her school with the subject line “Breaking all Boundaries”:

 

From: Esther Shkop <shkop@htc.edu>

Date: Thu, Feb 28, 2013 at 12:11 PM
Subject: Breaking all Boundaries
To: [REDACTED]
Cc: “olstein@htc.edu” <olstein@htc.edu>, “lipshitz@htc.edu” <lipshitz@htc.edu>
I received an anonymous phone call last night with a message from one of your “friends” on Facebook, who expressed great consternation and concern that you have chosen to publicize to “friends” (regardless of their age, sincerity and level of intimacy) your history of sexual abuse.  Your public Facebook page is troubling enough, as is your Google history [which are open to the whole world].  It is troubling primarily because you have chosen to identify yourself by your pathology.  You no longer appear as a full human – but rather as “case study” of a young woman warped by her childhood experiences, and is thus identified wholly by that past.

 

I am not asking you to deny your pain.  I am asking you to exercise a measure of discretion, and develop a plan to go beyond your past  towards healing.  You seem too intent on wallowing in the past, and drawing sick attention to yourself for all of the wrong reasons.

 

At the same, you identify yourself as a student of Hebrew Theological College, and by association besmirch your peers as well as yourself.

 

This misuse of social media is definitely a violation of the HTC Personal Conduct Policy (see page 17 in the Student Handbook). Consequently, the HTC Administration is putting you on formal notice that all inappropriate materials should be removed from your Facebook page forthwith – both on the front page and the back pages.

 

If you have questions about what is and is not appropriate, feel free to come to speak to me or Mrs. Lipshitz.

 

Sincerely,
Ester Shkop

 

Esther M. Shkop, Ph.D.
Dean, Machon Torani L’Banot
Blitstein Institute of Hebrew Theological College
2606 West Touhy Avenue
Chicago, IL  60645
773-973-0241
Hebrew Theological College’s actions would reduce free speech to misconduct and Kaylie* and her courage to nothing. The school’s actions are the only misconduct, and it is utterly horrendous.If you believe the school should rescind its notice of misconduct and issue an apology to Kalie* and other survivors, please contact:
If you believe the school should rescind its notice of misconduct and issue an apology to Kyalie* and other survivors, please contact:
Chancellor, Dr. Jerold Rabbi Isenberg
isenberg@htc.edu
Dean Shkop
shkop@htc.edu
Assitant Dean, Rita Lipshitz
comments will be approved on this article.  

Police not told of abuse claim: rabbi

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ONE of Australia’s most senior rabbis has revealed he did not inform police after a young boy contacted him to detail allegations of sexual abuse.

Rabbi Moshe Gutnick, who heads the Organisation of Rabbis of Australasia, said he received an anonymous phone call from a boy more than 20 years ago about the alleged abuse at Sydney’s Yeshiva.

Rabbi Gutnick, who was based in Strathfield in Sydney’s west at the time, said he alerted senior members of the Yeshiva about the boy’s allegations, but did not contact police. ”Knowing what I know now, I would have probably called the police,” he said.

Fairfax Media has also learnt of more child sexual abuse allegations at Bondi’s Yeshiva College in 2003.

The alleged abuser of the boy who contacted Rabbi Gutnick, and a male teacher accused of indecently assaulting a 12-year-old Yeshiva student at a camp in 2003, were both relocated overseas after complaints were made about them.

Fairfax Media does not suggest the Yeshiva community played any role in the men leaving the country.

The victim of the 2003 incident, who spoke on condition of anonymity, said his family reported the incident to the NSW Department of Community Services and to two principals at Yeshiva College.

The victim said he was dismayed to learn that the accused teacher was flown overseas within weeks of his complaint. ”How would anyone know if he went on to do the same thing there,” he said.

A source connected with Yeshiva said the college reported the 2003 incident to child protection services.

Rabbi Gutnick said a man, claiming to be the same boy from 20 years ago, contacted him in 2011. The rabbi said he urged the man to contact police.

Fairfax Media last month reported that the man accused of the 1980s sexual assaults on at least four victims, including the boy who contacted Rabbi Gutnick, was being investigated by NSW Police.

The alleged abuser told one of his victims in a recent conversation that he was called to the office of the Yeshiva Centre’s spiritual leader, Rabbi Pinchus Feldman.

”He [Rabbi Feldman] just told me it shouldn’t happen and I should take steps to avoid it,” the accused man told his alleged victim. ”It was a once-off conversation.”

The Yeshiva centre last week released a statement on behalf of Rabbi Feldman, who is Rabbi Gutnick’s brother-in-law, saying he had no recollection of any confession of child sexual abuse 25 years ago.

In response to a series of questions this week, the Yeshiva Centre said in a statement:

”Yeshiva treats its child welfare responsibilities with the utmost care and has always endeavoured to comply in full with all its legal and moral child safety obligations. It is our policy to consult with appropriate government authorities about such matters.

”Yeshiva representatives recently initiated a high-level meeting with the police to discuss an investigation into historical allegations of child abuse. The police have informed Yeshiva representatives that media speculation could endanger the success of their investigation.

”The police have requested that Yeshiva refer all inquiries relating to the investigation directly to them. It is therefore inappropriate for us to comment on any of these matters.”

Manny Waks, a Melbourne-based advocate for child sex abuse victims, said he was not surprised to learn of ”new serious allegations of a cover-up within an ultra-Orthodox institution”.

He commended Rabbi Gutnick’s admissions..

Former president of the Organisation of Rabbis of Australasia Rabbi Dovid Freilich said perpetrators and those who covered up abuse were both guilty of offences.

”Kids’ lives are destroyed and you want to cover it up? It’s disgusting,” he said.

 

TheAge.com  Richard Baker and Nick McKenzie

 

Shattered, but pieced back together

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Four years.
That’s a long time. 
But in that long time I have learned much.

For three years I was a mess, trying to gather the shattered glass and glue it all back together to make my picture whole again.

But a picture made of glass cannot be fixed without leaving traces; without leaving scars.

Once it is shattered, even if glued back together, the cracks will show.

I have glued the pieces back together; I have gotten myself out of that blank chaotic hole.

It took time, but I came to the realization that my glass picture shattered.

That my glass picture was thrown, and made to be shattered.

I came to the realization that no matter what anyone says, a glass picture CAN NOT jump onto the floor and break itself;

it is merely an inanimate object which has no choice in the matter. 

 

There are those who convince themselves that glass can jump, and that glass can make itself break.

Is that ridiculous? Well apparently it is not.

There are those who step on the broken glass and fool themselves into thinking that the glass never broke and there is no mess on the floor.

Though they are cutting themselves with the sharp ends of the tiny pieces, it is easier to say it never happened than to admit to guilt -

to admit that they didn’t do anything to help prevent the helpless glass picture from being thrown and smashed.

They would rather say that it never happened, or say that the silly picture decided to go for a jog and jumped off of the windowsill.


There are yet those who DO recognize when a glass picture has been smashed, but since theirs has never been, they can never fully understand the feeling of incompleteness.

From what they see, the picture was not completely smashed;

it was pretty easy to glue back together, and voilà! Picture is back to itself! Colorful and perfect as always! Colorful and perfect just like all other pictures.

They fail to recognize the scars left, the cracks that still show even after the glass is pieced back together.

The cracks will remain forever, but those around wish to forget already so that life can go on.

So that they can make believe that the glass was never broken.

 

The pieces of my glass picture have been glued back together.

I am a lucky one, since my pieces did not shatter as much as others.

The one who threw me did not throw me as hard as he threw the others, yet I am the only one who let it be known that I am not the one who jumped.

I let it be known that it was he who threw me.

It is he who is the maniac.

Why are so many people blinded by nonsense?

How can a world of people who call themselves intelligent allow themselves to be fooled to such an extent? 


Now, after four years I realize that my cracks and scars are not a badge of shame.

They have added new dimension to my picture.

I no longer look at them as cracks.

They are extra designs given to me to enhance the beauty of my picture.

Although at times I may forget myself, and bemoan my bitter fate, I must dig deep within myself and discover the beauty within and accept my new design. 

 

Anonymous
 

Rabbi YY Jacobson Takes a Stand

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B”H. The month of liberation, 5773. March 2013.


Dear Jewish Community Watch,

 

In response to your request—as well as to the many other inquiries and requests for my reaction to the issue of child abuse.

First, I want to express my sincere gratitude and accolades for all the hard work you and various other organizations and individuals are doing to put an end to the devastating crime of CSA, which has wreaked utter havoc in scores of innocent lives over so many years.

Sadly, many people, including some in leadership positions, are ill-informed of the detrimental effects of child molestation. The average person who has not suffered through CSA doesn’t realize how so many of the abused suffer for years or decades from feelings of inadequacy, loneliness, shame, guilt, and pain. Many of the victims—due to their profound pain and skewed sense of self—find temporary relief in all forms of destructive behavior, including molesting a new generation of children. Many of them fall prey to terrible addictions in order to escape their agony. Untold numbers of these innocent souls are haunted by unbearable nightmares that won’t allow them to lead a normal life internally. Most of them struggle to maintain functional marriages, since their sexual boundaries have been brutally violated.

Though recovery is surely possible—for the soul is more powerful than all else, and the Divine infinite power within each of us can overcome all darkness—the pain they must endure is heart-wrenching.

Many people are equally ill-informed of how rampant the problem is, and of the great number of our youth that have been victimized over the years.

But, thankfully, a new dawn has arrived.

Ever since dedicated volunteers have taken action and established organizations to combat this ugly malady, the issue of child molestation has been brought to the forefront of the community’s attention. It is no longer possible to ignore the seriousness of this epidemic. At last, we have begun—and only begun—to take the necessary steps to eradicate this black stain for good.

Initially, when the efforts began to expose predators’ names and photos, I was concerned that some activists would become obsessed with “witch hunting” and would inadvertently accuse innocent people of committing these terrible crimes—forever tainting their reputation. I was afraid that these investigations might not be thoroughly reviewed and vetted with the hyper-sensitivity and professionalism that this issue calls for. (I still shudder at the thought of an individual’s life being ruined by some mean-spirited person who has an axe to grind.) However, after much scrutiny I have learned that these investigations are thorough and honest. I have also learned that in cases where a past abuser is ready to be fully accountable and to do what it takes to help the victim through the healing-process (and, obviously, with experts testifying that he/she no longer poses a danger to the public), the abuser’s identity is not exposed. Additionally, I am also aware of dozens of cases presented to Jewish Community Watch that are not brought to light due to a lack of sufficient evidence.

Given the above, it is my heartfelt hope that all parents, rabbis, leaders, community activists, educators, principals, spiritual mentors, therapists, social workers and counselors will begin educating themselves regarding the lifelong effects of child molestation. They will then come to understand the untold suffering brought upon victims of CSA. Just as we would do anything to stop a gunman from walking our streets and taking lives, heaven forbid (what Jewish law calls a “rodef”), so must we do anything and everything to stop the people who are murdering the psyches and emotional innocence of our children.

We must also begin educating every single one of our young adults about two critical factors: 1) If they have been molested, help is available. They must know that if they will break the silence and reveal their story, they will be embraced rather than shunned, and will be guided with loving care towards a life of wholesomeness and happiness. We must give all of them the names and contact information of approved professionals, so they can reach out to them if necessary. 2) Preventive medicine: If they might ever be prone to engage in these terrible acts themselves, they must know: A) the horrific impact of such actions, and B) that there are things they can do to help them avoid becoming potential monsters who will surely destroy lives. They must all know that help is readily available for people with an inclination toward touching children inappropriately.

Parents and educators must discuss these dangers with their children and students—both the danger of becoming a victim, as well as the danger of becoming an abuser. Every—and I mean every—Yeshiva bachur must be educated about these two items.

We must also educate the community—both children and adults—on how important it is to talk to someone if they are privy to any sort of abuse being perpetrated in the community. To withhold this kind of information is essentially akin to being an accomplice and an enabler of the unthinkable crime of destroying lives in this vicious cycle. Most victims are too afraid or ashamed to speak up—and surely it is not their fault. They are terrified of being shunned, not believed, and of the possibility of being rejected forever. That is where our community stands today. We must change that and teach all of our youngsters that they will be heard, listened to, believed, and embraced with a loving heart and open arms. They will not be judged or ridiculed. We will treat their pain with the deepest respect and empathy.

***

Lest you think that the above information is based on speculation, I must tell you that unfortunately that is not the case. I come here today after many years of learning firsthand about the tragic plight of victims, and the ugly plight of abusers—who in the process of murdering others, murder themselves, too. It is now abundantly clear to me that by educating every boy and girl in our educational institutions about the horrors of CSA as outlined above, we will literally rescue countless precious souls from untold years of misery.

One case in point: A young man asked to meet with me some time ago. His story is not uncommon: He had been sexually molested in a particular Yeshiva by an older student who had been studying in this Yeshiva and was serving as a spiritual mentor of sorts to younger students. As the victim grew older, he in turn began to molest children himself, including his own siblings. (One of the facts about CSA is that it is often committed by close relatives or friends, and sometimes by very religious-looking people.) Concurrently, he had also become addicted to viewing unmentionable smut, which became part of his daily routine. He completely lost his boundaries for intimacy. Though he was—and still is—an extremely good-hearted young man, he was trapped in the disease of addiction and paralyzed by endless shame and guilt. He got married, but his marriage inevitably soon became dysfunctional. Floundering to survive, he discovered addictive drugs and was soon using them every day—including Yom Kippur. Finally, after hitting “rock-bottom,” this shattered “abused-abuser” shared his story with me. It was the first time that he had shared his true story with anyone, and it took him more than twenty years for to open up! He broke down and wept uncontrollably.

So many lives were destroyed from the actions of that older student. And so many lives could have been spared if the young man, the initial victim, would have known as a young adult that help is available and that he didn’t have to suffer all alone.

The brokenness and utter despondency I observed in this young man—and in many others with similar stories–is typical of victims of CSA. Many of them feel broken and crushed to the very core of their existence. Having been violated in the most vulnerable, holiest, and most sensitive part of their being—the part within us that most reflects G-d, possessing the ability to create new life—makes them feel like their lives are worthless.

Too much blood has been shed on the altar of silence and fear without anyone uttering even a cry. Victims have lived far too long by the code of shame and silence, always blaming themselves for the cruelty of their perpetrators. The devil of abuse has been allowed to grow strong and rampant because of our silence. It is time to declare all-out war—a war of information and education—against the silent bullets that have claimed thousands of our holiest and most beautiful souls.

We as a community must—and will—come forward publicly to support every effort being made on behalf of our innocent and precious youth. With Hashem’s help, we will succeed.

For such is the nature of light: it dispels even the densest of darkness.

 

Sincerely and thankfully,
Rabbi Yosef Yitzchak Jacobson
Dean, TheYeshiva.net

www.TheYeshiva.net

 

 

 


False allegations of rape and domestic violence are few and far between

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By Keir Starmer The Guardian

The Crown Prosecution Service has come a long way in dealing with cases involving violence against women and girls. In the last year (2011-12) we have seen the conviction rate rise to 73%, delivering the lowest attrition rates ever recorded. The CPS has now published a trailblazing report on so-called “false allegations” of rape or domestic violence.

In recent years both the police and prosecutors have put a great deal of effort into improving the way we investigate and prosecute sexual offences. The results of the changes and improvements that have been made are encouraging. Our committed and specialist staff have prioritised performance in these important and difficult cases. We have bolstered training, policies and guidance for rape and domestic violence specialists. Closer working with the police and specialist services has helped to address the types of ingrained practices that can ignore, or even add to, the victimisation of women and girls. But there is still more that we must do to improve.

In recent years we have worked hard to dispel the damaging myths and stereotypes associated with these cases. One such misplaced belief is that false allegations of rape and domestic violence are rife. This report presents a more accurate picture.

At the outset it is important that we acknowledge the very damaging impact that a false allegation of rape or sexual assault – be it either malicious or misguided – can have on the person falsely accused. Reputations can be ruined and lives can be devastated as a result. Such cases will be dealt with robustly and those falsely accused should feel confident that the CPS will prosecute these cases wherever there is sufficient evidence and it is in the public interest to do so.

However, these cases can be extremely complicated. In November 2010, the court of appeal considered an appeal against sentence in the case of Ms A, who ultimately pleaded guilty to perverting the course of justice on the basis that she had falsely retracted true allegations of rape she had made against her husband. This case underlined the need for police and prosecutors fully to investigate and carefully to consider the circumstances in which an allegedly false claim of rape, sexual assault, or domestic violence is made.

Following this case and in order further to support prosecutors in their decision making, I published new legal guidance on perverting the course of justice in July 2011. For a period of 17 months, I also required CPS areas to refer all cases involving an allegedly false allegation of rape, domestic violence, or both, to me personally to consider.

This report outlines the key findings from the review of those cases and the steps that we plan to take. Importantly, what it shows is that charges brought for perverting the course of justice or wasting police time for such “false” allegations need to be considered in the context of the total number of prosecutions brought for those offences. In the period of the review, there were 5,651 prosecutions for rape and 111,891 for domestic violence. During the same period there were 35 prosecutions for making false allegations of rape, six for making false allegation of domestic violence and three for making false allegations of both rape and domestic violence.

Furthermore, the report shows that a significant number of these cases involved young, often vulnerable people. About half of the cases involved people aged 21 years old and under, and some involved people with mental health difficulties. In some cases, the person alleged to have made the false report had undoubtedly been the victim of some kind of offence, even if not the one that he or she had reported.

This review has highlighted the complex nature of these cases. Prosecutors need to look critically at the behaviour and credibility of all those involved, not just the person making the complaint. In addition, the events of the last year have demonstrated that there is an urgent need for an informed national debate about the proper approach to the investigation and prosecution of sexual offences. That debate needs to extend well beyond the CPS and the police.

I know that this report will help us to ensure that we are able to make consistent and sound decisions in cases involving allegedly false allegations. I hope, too, that it will help to inform the wider debate. I look forward to working with colleagues and stakeholders on these important issues.

If You Suspect Your Child is Being Abused

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Parents are surrounded by messages about child sexual abuse. Talkshows and TV news warn parents about dangers onthe Internet, at school and at home. However, parents don’t get much advice on how to talk to their children if they are concerned that sexual abuse is occurring.

Talk to your child directly.

Pick your time and place carefully!

Have this conversation somewhere that your child feels comfortable.

DO NOT ask your child about child abuse in front of the person you think may be abusing the child!

Ask if anyone has been touching them in ways that don’t feel okay or that make them feel uncomfortable.

Know that sexual abuse can feel good to the victim, so asking your child if someone is hurting them may not get the information that you are looking for.

Follow up on whatever made you concerned. If there was something your child said or did that made you concerned, ask about that.

Ask in a nonjudgmental way, and take care to avoid shaming your child as you ask questions.

”I” questions can be very helpful. Rather than beginning your conversation by saying “You (the child) did something/said something that made me worry…” consider starting your inquiry with the word “I.” For example: “I am concerned because I heard you say that you are not allowed to close the bathroom door.”

Make sure that your child knows that they are not in trouble, and that you are simply trying to gather more information.

Talk with your child about secrets.

Sometimes abusers will tell children that sexual abuse is a secret just between them. They may ask the child to promise to keep it secret.

When you talk to your child, talk about times that it’s okay not to keep a secret, even if they made a promise.

Build a trusting relationship with your child.

Let your child know that it is okay to come to you if someone is making them uncomfortable.

Be sure to follow up on any promises you make—if you tell your child that they can talk to you, be sure to make time for them when they do come to you!

All children should know that it’s okay to say “no” to touches that make them uncomfortable or if someone is touching them in ways that make them uncomfortable and that they should tell a trusted adult as soon as possible.

Let your child know that you won’t get angry at them if they tell someone “no.” Children are often afraid that they will get into trouble if they tell someone not to touch them.

Teach children that some parts of their body are private.

Tell children that if someone tries to touch those private areas or wants to look at them, OR if someone tries to show the child their own private parts, they should tell a trusted adult as soon as possible.

Let children know that they will not be in trouble if they tell you about inappropriate touching.

Make sure to follow through on this if your child does tell you about inappropriate touching! Try not to react with anger towards the child.

If you have reason to be concerned about sexual abuse, there may be other signs of sexual abuse as well. Here is a list of those signs. As you talk to your child about sexual abuse, remember to focus on creating a safe place for your child. Even if they don’t tell you about sexual abuse at the time of the conversation, you are laying a foundation for future conversations.

 

 

Know the Warning Signs of Sexual Abuse

 

Warning signs of sexual abuse in younger children:

Trouble walking or sitting

Precocious awareness of sexual topics

Seductive behavior

Unprecedented shyness about getting undressed

Avoiding a specific individual for no apparent reason

Sleep disturbances

Bedwetting or soiling

Expressing concern about genitalia

 

Warning signs of sexual abuse in older children

Unusual interest in or avoidance of sexual topics

Depression or suicidal thoughts

Self-isolation/emotional aloofness

Hostility or aggressive behavior

Secretiveness

Seductive behavior

Sleep disturbances

Substance abuse

Reluctance to go back to camp

 

 

Information in this page was adapted from RAINN

Allegations Against Employee at JEM Center In Los Angeles Sparks Uproar 8/6/13

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By Chaim Levin

Los Angeles, CA —  An event was held last night by Jewish parents in Beverly Hills who were concerned about the claims of abuse leveled against counselor/director of JEM center Mendel Tevel. The event was hosted in the home of Esther Abehsera and was organized by Meyer Seewald, director of Jewish Community Watch. In attendance were Deputy District Attorney Rabbi Benny Forer, and one of Tevel’s numerous alleged victims that agreed to talk to the crowd without using his name. About 50 people were in attendance for the event that was announced just four hours before it was scheduled to take place. The victim agreed to talk on the condition that people would leave phones and recording devices at the door, with the hope that by telling his story to a large group of people, the charges against Tevel would be taken more seriously because someone agreed to speak in front of a real live audience.

The alleged victim now 23, supported by his wife told the crowd that he was 14 when the abuse occurred. With his wife by his side, he recounted how when he was 14 years old he attended “Shterns” Yeshiva in Upstate New York. He recounted: “when I was 14, I was in Yeshiva. We called it Shterns. Mendel Tevel was my Mashpia (mentor) and teacher. It started out when it became a big thing in school to work out, lift weights. Tevel offered to be my personal trainer, and he would push me to work harder and harder, and one time he in order to make me work harder he would whip me with a metal. hanger. And from then on, If i stopped working out I’d get whacked in the back with a metal hanger. I had marks, I bled, and I had cuts.” He further alleged that the abuse escalated “After a few days of working out with him, he started offering me messages to relax my muscles so that I wouldn’t be sore that day. After a few times he got into bed with me and sat on top of me to give me a message. I hate to be a little bit vulgar but while he was giving me the message he was “dry humping me.” “From there it progressed where every day he tried to get me to go to the mikva before Shachris (prayer service). He offered to go with me personally because I didn’t like to be part of the large crowd that go together. One day it was really cold and it was so cold that there was a layer of ice over the Mikvah and I didn’t want to go in. Tevel came up behind me and started smacking me on my behind, and I realized that Tevel had an erection.” It was in that moment that the victim says he realized that something was “not quite right” with what was going on withl and maintains that he distanced himself from Tevel from that point on.

Last week, on a Facebook group called LA Mommies, a member of the group posted about her concern about Tevel’s past and his involvement with JEM center. In her post (which has since been deleted), she alleged that she was contacted by a concerned parent who had heard that Tevel was working at JEM high school. The thread quickly escalated, and one parent, a mother of three wanted to make sure other parents knew about the allegations against Tevel.
This mother said that she was “deeply concerned,” when she saw a Facebook post by Devorah Wagshul, sister in law of Mendel Tevel about JEM with the caption “Ran by the best directors, Aka Bracha and Mende[l]”, attached was a recent Facebook post by JEM Hebrew High. Upon further investigation, this flyer was found on JEM’s website, the phone number lists Brocha Illulian as the contact person for the program, Bracha Illulian is the wife of Mendel Tevel.
After calls to JEM center, a woman who would only identify herself as Chelsea said that “We’re safe here, there’s really not an issue, everyone already knows that there’s no issue.” When asked if Tevel was still part of the staff at JEM she said that “There’s no issue, everyone’s safe, there’s nothing wrong. Nothing happened. Everyone knows this, these are false accusations… and, he didn’t do this, to anybody. They’re lying.”JEM Center, which was founded by Rabbi Hertzel illulian in 1984, was once connected to Chabad but has since separated from the movement and operates independently.
Other attendees of the event recounted their own personal stories of being abused when they were minors. One of them, Mordy Gluckowsky alleges that he was abused by his dorm counselor at a Chabad yeshiva abroad, but when he notified the principal of his school he was expelled two days later.
According to David Smith*, asked that his real name not be used, he was sexually abused by Tevel repeatedly when he was 14/15 years old. David recounts moments where Tevel “whacked him” on his rear with a leather belt; he also recalls multiple incidents of oral sex being performed on him by Tevel. David, who grew up in the Crown Heights community still has the ability to press charges against Tevel for another few months but is reluctant to do so because of what he describes as “strong family pressure and community pressure” placed upon him not to do anything to Tevel. David alleges that he was contacted by a member of the Tevel family and was offered money in exchange for his silence, David says he didn’t accept this offer but is still very reluctant to come forward.
Another alleged victim of Tevel who is past the statute of limitations recounted how Tevel would lure him the basement of his parents’ home by offering him candy, the use of his game boy, and recalls “He would tie me up to the trampoline and would whip me on my backside with a belt, sometimes with my clothes on and sometimes with my clothes off.” This alleged victim’s testimony is very similar to that of other victims who say that aside from the sexual abuse they endured by Tevel, there was a significant amount of physical assault perpetrated against them by Tevel with leather belts in their backside area.
A letter written by members of the Jewish community has already acquired almost 75 signatures within 24 hours. The letter offers support and encouragment to victims of Tevel to come forward. The reason for writing this letter according Seewald was because “we want to show the victims how much support there already is out there, public support for them. There are so many people who are anonymously offering their support, that’s not good enough anymore.” As this story continues to grow, many people in the Los Angeles communities are unsure or uncertain if their children are safe while attending JEM center. Some mothers are alleging that Tevel sometimes goes to the Hebrew High school in Beverly Hills to put on Tefilin with younger teenagers. Other parents expressed concern about Brocha Illulian, Tevel’s wife who would frequently stand near their children’s schools and hands out flyers promoting JEM’s upcoming events.
Seewald, who attempted to alert the Illulian family before Tevel was engaged to their daughter said: “I went directly to Rabbi Hertzel Illulian when I heard that his daughter was getting engaged to Tevel. Rabbi Illulian outright dismissed the possibility that Tevel still poses a danger to children, and when I told him the graphic details given to me by one of Tevel’s victims in which the victim recounted Tevel performing oral sex on him, Illulian asked me if “he [the victim] enjoyed it”. A response that even for Seewald, who claims to have heard about so many similar stories, shocked him. “He tried to blame the victim by implying that because he might have enjoyed it, it was his fault.”
Seewald remarked that the event that “it was revolutionary. For the first time in two years a victim got up and talked to parents for the sake of protecting children even though he knew that people may find out his identity. I’ve never seen a victim empowering so many other people to talk. I hope that people learn from this that there’s nothing to be embarrassed or ashamed of. People should see that coming forward is not just something that will help the public, but it will also help victims heal from their personal trauma.” He ended off by saying that he hopes that this turn of events will set a better precedent for victims of the Chabad community in Crown Heights. “We have almost 70 signatures by now, but hardly any of them are from members of the Crown Heights community, where Tevel committed many of his alleged crimes.” Seewald remarked that this event was a very emotional one for him, and he hopes that the Crown Heights and greater Chabad communities will follow the example set by the people who attended this event and also by the people who signed the letter of support.
*name changed to protect the anonymity of this person

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Don’t be afraid of what others will think for taking a stand, End this vicious silence by showing your full name in support of the brave survivors who have come forward already, and for the one’s who are afraid to but might change their mind if they see someone like you proud to support them.   Click Here

 

Prevention Tips: Because Knowledge is Power…

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By Pattie Fitzgerald from SafelyEverAfter.com

1. REMIND YOUR CHILDREN:  SAFE GROWNUPS DON’T ASK KIDS FOR HELP.

2. NEVER LEAVE YOUNG CHILDREN UNSUPERVISED…  NOT EVEN FOR A MINUTE.

3. REPLACE THE WORD “STRANGER” WITH “TRICKY PERSON”
IT’S NOT WHAT SOMEONE LOOKS LIKE, IT’S WHAT THEY SAY OR WANT TO DO WITH A CHILD THAT MAKES THEM UNSAFE OR “TRICKY”.

4. A TRICKY PERSON CAN BE SOMEONE YOU KNOW WELL, DON’T KNOW AT ALL, OR KNOW JUST A LITTLE BIT… LIKE YOUR MAIL CARRIER OR THE ICE CREAM MAN. ANYONE WHO TRIES TO GET A CHILD TO BREAK THEIR SAFETY RULES OR HURT THEIR BODY IS NOT OKAY.

5. LISTEN TO YOUR CHILD.  IF THEY DON’T WANT TO BE AROUND A PARTICULAR PERSON, SUCH AS A BABYSITTER, RELATIVE, OR FAMILY FRIEND, DON’T FORCE THEM.  THEY MAY BE GETTING A “RED FLAG” SIGNAL THAT YOU ARE UNAWARE OF.

6. PRACTICE PERSONAL SAFETY STRATEGIES WITH YOUR KIDS: WHAT WOULD THEY DO IF THEY WERE LOST IN A STORE?  WHAT WOULD THEY SAY IF SOMEONE ASKED THEM FOR DIRECTIONS OR ASSISTANCE?

7. DO NOT WRITE YOUR CHILD’S NAME ON THE OUTSIDE OF ANY PERSONAL BELONGINGS SUCH AS A BACKPACK OR JACKET.

8. OLDER CHILDREN SHOULD ALWAYS USE THE BUDDY SYSTEM WHENEVER AND WHEREVER POSSIBLE.

9. “THE UH-OH FEELING”: TRUST YOUR INSTINCTS AND LET YOUR CHILD KNOW IT’S OKAY FOR THEM TO TRUST THEIRS.

10. ESTABLISH A STRAIGHTFORWARD FAMILY RULE:
NO SECRETS ALLOWED, ESPECIALLY IF IT INVOLVES ANOTHER ADULT.

11. LET CHILDREN DECIDE FOR THEMSELVES HOW THEY WANT TO EXPRESS AFFECTION.  DO NOT FORCE THEM TO HUG OR KISS ANOTHER PERSON.

12. SPEND TIME WITH YOUR KIDS.   CHILDREN WHO ARE STARVED FOR ATTENTION CAN BE ESPECIALLY VULNERABLE TO A PREDATOR’S TRICKS.

13. VOLUNTEER AT YOUR CHILD’S SCHOOL OR OTHER ACTIVITIES. KNOW WHO THE PEOPLE ARE WHO ARE INTERACTING WITH YOUR CHILDREN.

14. DEVELOP STRONG COMMUNICATION SKILLS WITH YOUR CHILD SO THAT THEY WILL FEEL SAFE COMING TO YOU IF SOMETHING IS BOTHERING THEM.

15. TEACH SAFETY CONCEPTS IN A LOVING, EASY-GOING MANNER. SCARE TACTICS CAN MAKE A CHILD FEARFUL AND ARE NOT NECESSARY.

200 Orthodox Jews Gather for Child Sexual Abuse Event

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For immediate release:

Over 200 Orthodox Jews Gather Against

Sexual Abuse in the Jewish Community

LOS ANGELES, CA – On Tuesday, August 20th, 2013, over 200 Orthodox Jews gathered at Congregation Shaarei Tefillah of Los Angeles to hear a series of lectures on the topic of sexual abuse and pedophilia within the Jewish community. The event was coordinated by child abuse advocacy group Jewish Community Watch, and the overall theme was clear: Sexual crimes against children will no longer be tolerated.

Opening the program was guest speaker Dennis Brown; Substance Abuse Professional and Executive Director of the NESS Counseling Center. Brown lectured on his extensive experience with sexual predators, noting that many of them reside at home with their families, living double lives.

“It’s hard to believe there are so many cover-ups,” said Brown. “That’s why it’s all of our responsibilities to not be afraid or ashamed, but to stand up and say, ‘He did something!’ If it means that person will be incarcerated or registered, so be it.”

Local Criminal Prosecutor Benny Forer spoke about sexual abuse from a legal perspective, giving the audience a general overview on how sex crimes are investigated and prosecuted. He also stressed the importance of a nationwide sex offender registry, saying that pedophiles fear registration far more than they do incarceration, and that a registry list actually reduces recidivism.

A highly anticipated and enlightening lecture was delivered by Rabbi Elchonon Tauber; renowned Torah scholar and teacher. Rabbi Tauber is often asked to sit on the rabbinic panels of many of the city’s most complex Din Torahs (Jewish court-cases) – most commonly involving questions relating to the societal changes of modern times.

R. Tauber stated that in cases of child abuse, a person must immediately alert the authorities. It is of popular opinion among the Orthodox community that in no circumstances is a Jew allowed to report another Jew. R. Tauber explained that this school of thought is “absolutely false.”

“When you take sex out of the equation, people find it easier to digest. So, let’s take sex out of it. Let’s say that someone was going into schools and putting a type of poison in the children’s food that would make them sick for the rest of their lives. Would you go to the Rabbis? No. You would call 911. You would go straight to the police.”

R. Tauber also warned that according to Torah law, if someone knows a molester and does not report that person to the authorities, he or she is also considered to be a molester. He went on to site numerous Biblical, Talmudic, and Rabbinic sources where this found to be true.

Pattie Fitzgerald of Safely Ever After, Inc. has been successfully teaching Child Predator Safety Awareness since 2001.  Her lecture consisted of information on keeping children safe and teaching them how to recognize red flags. According to Fitzgerald, 1 in 4 girls and 1 in 6 boys are sexually exploited before they reach adulthood, yet less than 35% of cases are ever reported. These children are mostly between the ages of 9 and 12 years old.

The final speaker of the evening was Meyer Seewald; Founder and Director of Jewish Community Watch (JCW). Seewald explained that since its inception in 2011, JCW has become the only real safety-zone for victims worldwide, and that they have so far compiled a massive database of over 225 suspected and convicted sex offenders living in Orthodox Jewish communities across the globe. Seewald continues to receive reports from victims and parents of victims. He says that the JCW is currently volunteering specialists, therapists, rabbis, educators, and members of law enforcement to increase their efforts in supporting victims and exposing their perpetrators.

“For the first time, it’s the molesters who are scared,” said Seewald. “And they have to be, because if you touch a child, you will regret it.”

 “You should not wait until your child or someone close to you is molested. Look at every single Jewish child who is molested as your son, your daughter, your brother, or your sister – and take it personally. Because that is the only way we can make a difference.”

Meyer Seewald discusses JCW (768x1024) (1) Fitzgerlad lectures on child safety (1024x768) DSC06536 (1024x680) Benny Forer discusses the legal implications of CSA (680x1024) DSC06569 (680x1024) Dennis Brown answers questions from the audiencee (1024x680)

 

Why Are Convicted Child Molesters Getting Probation?

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Why Are Convicted Child Molesters Getting Probation?

Stand Up and Be Heard

By: Rabbi Yakov Horowitz

Hudson Valley’s News 12 released this video Thursday evening about the slap-on-the-wrist six year probation sentence given to Herschel Taubenfeld, who pleaded guilty to 30 misdemeanor counts of forcible touching, endangering the welfare of a child and third-degree sex abuse.

This is not an isolated incident, but rather a pattern where Rockland District Attorney Thomas Zugibe is agreeing to and the judges are granting no-jail-time probation “sentences” to child molesters, among them Shmuel Dym and Moishe Turner. (Turner was recently found davening in a Wesley Hill shul until he was banished by people who read about his sex-offender status in our recent emails on the child safety matter.)

There are those who will tell you that these probation “sentences” rehabilitate the predators by frightening them into controlling their evil impulses. I beg to differ. I think they only embolden them as this sends a horrible message that they will never be punished for their heinous crimes.

If you think differently, just have a look at how Turner and Dym, who are both registered sex offenders, (see Turner and Dym in the NYS Sex Offender Registry) responded to their good fortune of avoiding long prison sentences:

• As incredible as it sounds, Turner BLAMED HIS VICTIM for the abuse according to remarks by Rockland County Supreme Court Judge William Kelly. And this happened while the eyes of the media and the criminal justice system were on him!! Can you imagine the contempt for the law Turner has now that the attention is off him??

• Shmuel Dym violated EIGHT conditions of his probationary sentenceand was returned to jail. Again, this took place while he was in the process of appealing his own guilty plea.

My dear friends, your children are not safe and will never be safe as long as these miscarriages of justice continue and as long as these monsters who ravage our innocent children are permitted to walk our streets without fear of prosecution and real jail time.

Those of us who work with and do our best to comfort the abuse victims in our community cannot reverse this trend by ourselves.

Sorry to be blunt, but if you want your kids to be able to walk the streets without being abducted and attend shul without being molested, you will need to stand up and be heard.

If you want positive change to occur, take the time to write a respectful email to the DA’s office at info@rocklandcountyda.com, to Steve Lieberman who covers the local beat for The Journal News atslieberm@lohud.com, and file a Citizen Service Request with The Ramapo Police.

Respectfully convey your wishes that those who destroy the lives of our children should be arrested, prosecuted, and sentenced to the fullest extent of the law. From the many conversations I have had with law enforcement officials locally and nationally, many or most of them are under the impression that we want to “handle these matters internally.” And we have all painfully seen how effective that has been.

Law enforcement officials are human beings just like the rest of us. They get frustrated beyond words when they arrest predators who richly deserve long prison sentences and then watch as political pressure is applied and their dedicated efforts are washed away. After this happens a few times, they just throw up their hands.

As a high-ranking police officer once told me years ago, “Rabbi, we can’t care more about your kids than you do.”

My dear friends, let’s start caring more about the kids and less about the monsters who ruin their lives.

It is time to stand up and be heard.

P.S. Parents; please speak to your children about BOTH “Stranger Danger” and overall “Child Safety/Abuse Prevention.

Here are links to 3 free 4-5 minute videos which are designed to give you the tools and language to have safety talks with your kids:

#1 youtu.be/O3i9Gdlbw1g

#2. youtu.be/zS7WBs_osNE

#3 youtu.be/lp0vjJolygQ
and you can purchase our Project YES child safety book, “Let’s Stay Safe!” online at http://www.rabbihorowitz.com/letsstaysafe/index.html or at any of the local Jewish bookstores.

You can also download our Read-Aloud Video Version of our Child Safety Book here and watch it with your children.

Putting the Blame Where it Really Belongs

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I have to give Rabbi Yakov Horwitz credit. He confronts  evil, looks it in the eye, and loudly and clearly tells it like it is.
In his latest essay posted on his website his criticism (…no doubt generated by the video he links to) is directed at the elected officials in the New Square area. He tells us that these officials do little more than give convicted pedophiles a slap on the wrist for multiple counts sex abuse.  They serve no time in jail. These pedophiles are then free to roam the streets for more victims.
Rabbi Horowitz doesn’t spell it out. But the implications are obvious in my view. The person really responsible for this is the Skever Rebbe himself. The elected officials of the criminal justice system whose judges mete out sentences to these pedophiles treat them with kid gloves. Because they fear losing their jobs.  That fear is genuine.
I recently wrote about the political clout places like this have. And this is a perfect example of how it can be misused. When the Skverer Rebbe tells his Chasidim who to vote for, that is who gets elected. And the Rebbe uses that power to protect those of his Chasidim who are pedophiles and have sexually abused children in his city.
This is a city, once described by Rabbi Yitzchok Frankfurter, publisher of Ami Magazine as an inspiring and enviable place of holiness. Where Jews celebrate their Judaism in ways rivaled by few if any other. But even as that may be true it is also a very sick society!
This is a society that has no clue about the dangers of pedophiles roaming their city streets. Nor do they understand that a pedophile cannot be disabused of his sexual orientation. They are only attracted sexually to pre-pubescent children.  Skvere is a society that is under the complete influence of a single individual, the Skverer Rebbe.
He has taught his Chasidim that one of the worst sins a Jew can do is to be a Moser – informing on a fellow Jew to the government. That the cost of doing so endangers their children doesn’t even occur to them. This is a society that refuses to put pedophiles that are fellow Skverer Chasidim in jail. Pedophiles are even believed when they blame their victims!

Why was Rabbi Frankfurter so inspired? I’m sure it’s very inspiring to spend a Shabbos there. One will see Shabbos spent in unified celebration by the entire town. What a sight it must be to see every single male Chasid Davening in the same large Shul… where the Rebbe himself Davens. Even though it is mandatory for his Chasdidm to do so, no one is ever heard to complain about it. Well… almost never. More about that later.

I’m sure that the vast majority of its citizens more than love their Rebbe. They idolize him. It is very understandable why. He is stern but very giving person. He is very kind to them… spending a lot of time with each Chasid as they come to him for advice on all matters. They consider him wise beyond all other men. His counsel is always accepted. When his advice is followed – which it probably almost always is – it always seems to produce the best results. They must have an inordinate amount of love, respect, and awe for him. They are happy campers.
In fact I don’t think it would be too much of an exaggeration to say that their entire community is camp-like in many ways. It is almost cult-like. A social community matched by few others.
But the price they pay for all that harmony and joy is too high. Veering even slightly from the norm has serious consequences. Sometimes those consequences are life threatening. As they were when one Chasid tried to create a separate Minyan for a friend who was hospitalized. That fellow paid for that with third degree burns all over his body as the result of failed arson attempt by a young man who was an in house servant of the Rebbe. He believed he was protecting the Rebbe’s honor via punishing this man because he violated the rules against separate Minyanim.
But even for those who do not veer from the path set by their Rebbe. They still pay a price. The price of exposing their children to free roaming pedophiles. Who knows how many victims there are that have been told to sweep their abuse under the rug – and just get on with their lives. And how many of those young victims end up with life long suffering, often including depression and sometimes suicide. Not to mention going OTD.
Rabbi Horowitz’s advises writing respectful letters to District Attorney’s office. I agree. But it should be very clear why this office has responded so favorably to pedophiles. They see it as the will of the people that elected them. And that is an electorate controlled by the Rebbe himself. As Rabbi Horowitz says:

Law enforcement officials are human beings just like the rest of us. They get frustrated beyond words when they arrest predators who richly deserve long prison sentences and then watch as political pressure is applied and their dedicated efforts are washed away. After this happens a few times, they just throw up their hands.

Indeed. As I said, Rabbi Horowitz doesn’t say so. But I don’t see how anyone can say that the buck does not stop at the Skverer Rebbe’s desk. It is the political pressure of the Skverer Rebbe through his power over the ballot box that is the source of the problem.  And it’s about time the world knew it! Enough Korbonos.

Update
Upon discussing this with a friend who lives in Monsey and for the sake of accuracy I have been informed of the following. New Square is part of the larger community there.They represent only one constituency among many that vote for the DA in that area. There are other factions there that are like minded and control large voting blocks. So even though I can’t put the entire responsibility at the feet of the Skverer Rebbe – I have been assured that the problem exists as I described it. Only that it involves more than one faction.


Open Letter To Rabbi Avrohom Osdoba & Rabbi Shea Hecht

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Dear Rabbi Avrohom Osdoba & Rabbi Shea Hecht,

You both are men of prominence and have done immeasurable good for hundreds if not thousands of Jewish men, women, and children. The community looks to you for guidance and support and indeed you provide it. Countless have turned to you and have been helped by your advice and wisdom.

But, in a major way you have failed your community: you have failed to protect our innocent children from the worst of evils.

 

Rabbi Osdoba:

1) You were informed that Moshe Keller had allegedly abused children. Rather than confronting this appropriately, you simply referred the information to a colleague so you wouldn’t have to do anything. The police were not called, the community was not informed and more children were abused as a result of your inaction.

2) You were approached by a victim of abuse through a third-party and it was detailed to you how Leibel Blesofsky allegedly molested and raped this young boy. Not only did you do nothing, you virtually threatened this boy that if he came forward the whole community would know about it and he would never get married. Your words dissuaded this victim from pursuing any action. Your words served to ensure that Leibel Blesofsky would continue to roam the streets of Crown Heights, preying on more innocent children.

3) When you were contacted about another molester in the community, you were warned that he was a danger to children. You ignored the fact that he had stopped going to therapy, failed a polygraph test and that he had admitted to molesting children. Your response to all this was that he should go to mikvah every morning and twice on Friday for his sins – right beside our precious children! 
Rabbi Osdoba, because of your lack of action, because of your ignorant protection of Jews who had committed the most heinous of acts, an untold number of children had their lives stripped from them.

Rabbi Hecht:

1) When you found out that Zerach Scott Brown had and was molesting children, all you did was have him removed from our community. Yet, Brown continued to molest children from our community as well as children from others. Your feeble excuse for not doing more was that the parents of the victim did not want to press charges (which they would have had you informed them of their halachic obligation to do so).

2) Moshe Keller moved to Crown Heights many years ago and despite you having seen the document that described the horrific things he had done to a child, you helped him settle in our community. With Keller being a close friend of yours, you chose to believe him innocent despite the reputable document.
Years later in 2007, a young man emailed you a detailed account of the abuse he experienced at the hands of Keller; but, you felt not the need to even respond to him. You neither provided support nor consolation to this young victim who had taken the tremendous step of coming forward.

3) When a child came to you telling you of the devastating abuse he was subject to at the hands of Tzion Zuviv, you again failed to take action. Your reasoning was that it was another Jew and you weren’t sure what to do in this case.
Zuviv is now free and roaming the streets of Yerushalayim – his neighbors oblivious to the danger.

4) On another occasion, you had the audacity to defend Leibel Blesofsky claiming the victim was lying and that there was no truth to it all when you knew that there was substantial evidence confirming the abuse.

Rabbi Hecht, you present yourself as an advocate for victims – a leader for counsel and support; but, you have failed the community again and again. You have protected your friends and have continuously ignored the screams of victims.

Rabbi Avrohom Osdoba, Rabbi Shea Hecht, these stories are just the tip of iceberg. They are but a few of the cover-ups you were accessory to. We put our trust in you and you repaid us with deceit. How many children have these people molested because you refused to intercede.

To all the leaders, rosh yeshivas, camp directors etc. who have covered up these horrific crimes: how do you sleep at night? Look at all the Jewish souls that have been trampled on and destroyed! How many are not religious anymore? How many lives have been ruined because of you?

We recently commemorated the assassination of Gedaliah whose death is compared to the destruction of the Beis Hamikdash. Despite the holiness of Gedaliah, he was still considered a murderer.
It says in יִרְמְיָהוּ:
וְהַבּוֹר, אֲשֶׁר הִשְׁלִיךְ שָׁם יִשְׁמָעֵאל אֵת כָּל-פִּגְרֵי הָאֲנָשִׁים אֲשֶׁר הִכָּה בְּיַד-גְּדַלְיָהוּ
The gemara explains that because Gedaliah was warned and still did nothing, he is regarded as the one who had killed them.

Rabbis, for every child that was molested because you failed to take action against a perpetrator that you were warned about, It is just like you molested them! And just as our organization serves to inform the public of child predators, we also have the obligation to expose those who have enabled them to hurt our children.

The days after Rosh Hashana leading to Yom Kippur, are designated as a time for teshuva. As the Rambam explains, teshuva implies a reversal of one’s conduct — a rec­ognition of past shortcomings, and a firm resolution to change in the future.

As prominent halachic authorities, surely you know what measures must be taken in order to properly rectify any misdeeds you have done. Recently, the Rabbinic Authority of Australia released a letter expressing their remorse for past actions and inactions. Their respectable gesture would stand tremendously if mirrored by you.

It is also important that a public announcement be made by each of you directing cases involving sexual abuse to go directly to the authorities and not to be circumvented by an inexperienced rabbinical figure. This announcement should also address the halachic imperative to go to the authorities if someone should have knowledge of an incident involving sexual abuse. Needless to say, by taking this initiative you must pay heed to your own words and examine your own historical accumulation of information. In the decades each of you stood as communal leaders, hundreds of cases of sexual abuse have crossed your paths. It is time for you to collect all the names of all the perpetrators and release them to the police and to the public.

This Yom Kippur, while your fist hits your chest, think about the children whose lives you helped destroy. Consider how many innocent boys and girls were abused because of your misguided ideals. Realize that you will never be able to personally ask mechila from all the victims whose blood is on your hands. Know that the abuse that you turned a blind eye to will linger because of you for years to come.

So while you daven, cry for the children. Cry for the mothers and fathers who bore witness to their child’s pain and suffering. Cry for the coming generations that will forever feel the resounding ripple of the abuse you helped commit.

Finally, accept that your past actions were wrong and vow to change your ways. Stand up and declare your resolve to help put a stop to this evil. Provide your support to the victims of these crimes and not to the perpetrators. Perhaps, after all this, when you stand before the Beis Din Shelmayla, the neshomos of the victims who stand there to testify against you, may forgive you.
Meyer Seewald,
Founder & Director
Jewish Community Watch

 

 

Video: When should orthodox Jews expose child molesters?

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Jewish Community Watch, a child-sexual-abuse advocacy group, held a landmark seminar directed toward addressing sexual abuse issues within the Jewish community. The following video contains some highlights from the three-hour seminar.

The event featured a variety of experts from a range of fields. Rav Tauber, a world-renowned Rav, Dayan and Rabbi, lectured and provided insight into Jewish legal and halachic perspective. Rav Tauber loudly proclaimed that any rabbi that assists a predator is equivalent to having committed the crime himself. Benny Forer, a veteran criminal prosecutor, discussed legal issues pertaining to CSA and explained the reasons why there is a life-time registration requirement for sex-offenders. Dennis Brown, Executive Director of the Ness Counseling Center, provided insight into the mind of a predator and his motivations. Meyer Seewald, Director of JCW, recounted his story and reasons for creating the organization.

Jewish Community Watch is an organization dedicated toward the eradication of child sexual abuse within the orthodox Jewish community. As a victim advocacy group and community awareness center, JCW provides information to community members relating to accused predators as well as providing training and resources for survivors and their families.

Take it personal. Make a difference.

There is a growing new wave of people in our community that are standing with us to support the victim and prevent future victims. Join us by sharing this video and ‘LIKE’ing us on Facebook: facebook.com/jewishcommunityWatch.org

BREAKING: All News articles on Mendel Tevel

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10/31/2013 Mendel Tevel Waives Extradition in Alleged sex abuse

10/30/2013  Mendel Tevel in Los Angeles jail awaiting extradition

10/30/2013  Victim talks to CBSnews

Abclocal Reports:

A rabbi, who worked at a Beverly Hills youth center, is accused of child sex abuse in New York. Some say his alleged crimes were known in the community, but they were just swept under the rug.

The 30-year-old rabbi was arrested on Tuesday on charges of sexual criminal acts. In the grand jury Indictment out of Brooklyn, Tevel is accused of performing an oral sex act on one victim several times in the past. The incidents occurred about eight years ago. Tevel was 22 at the time and the victim was 14.

Authorities say the victim was abused several times in Tevel’s car starting in 2005. The victim was not sure if he should come forward to report the abuse, since so much time had passed. He finally alerted police on Sept. 12.

Though only one victim is mentioned in the indictment, authorities are investigating other possible allegations as well.

“He was arrested for child molestation allegations, on child endangerment allegations. Everything will, I’m sure, be publicized as soon as the official charges are made in New York,” said Ilanit Gluckowsky with the Jewish Community Watch, an organization that focuses on child abuse prevention.

Some members of the orthodox Jewish community, who did not want to be shown on camera, say they have known about the allegations for some time and are glad something is finally being done.

“People know about it. It’s not a big secret. Everybody is doing their best to brush it under the rug and pretend it doesn’t happen in our community,” said one anonymous member of the community.

Community members say Tevel has worked at JEM, a Jewish youth center in Beverly Hills, for the past two years. His father-in-law, who is the director at the center, spoke with Eyewitness News after his son-in-law’s arrest.

“God will help that it will show that it’s all false and will clear up and people will see while we will still continue our good job for the community,” said Rabbi Hertzel Illulian.

Some community members believe Illulian knew about the allegations and did nothing.

“He has been notified of this a number of times. There have been community meetings about this. Rabbi Illulian has just basically taken an arrogant hard line, you know, ‘I’m going to do what I want,’” said an anonymous member of the community.

However, the JEM center denies this.

“Law enforcement told them there was no warrant, there was no criminal investigation, so JEM Center attempted to do due diligence. They were assured by law enforcement that nothing was going on and then they were surprised today at this arrest,” said Dana Cole, an attorney for the JEM Center.

Tevel’s extradition hearing is expected to take place on Thursday.

 

Links On JCW

Op-Ed: From one victim to all the others
JewishJournal: Childhood abuse victims name alleged abuser
Allegations Against Employee at JEM Center In Los Angeles Sparks Uproar 8/6/13
An Open Letter to the Victims of Mendel Tevel
Press Release: Update regarding Mendel Tevel

 

Links to News articles: 

Beverly Hills Police report arrest of alleged sex abuser

Crown Heights Rabbi Accused Of Child Molestation Arrested In Beverly Hills

Rabbi arrested for alleged child sexual abuse | abc7.com

NY Rabbi Arrested In Beverly Hills On Molestation Charges « CBS 

Rabbi Arrested in Beverly Hills on Child Sexual Abuse Charges 

Tevel is married to Bracha, the daughter of JEM’s director, Rabbi Hertzel Illulian

 

 

 

Mendel Tevel in Los Angeles jail awaiting extradition

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Menachem Mendel Tewel, who goes by the name Mendel Tevel, remains in a Los Angeles jail awaiting extradition to Brooklyn. The rabbi and youth worker arrested Tuesday afternoon at the JEM Center in Beverly Hills is expected to be charged in New York with three counts of sexual abuse, according to officials in the Brooklyn District Attorney’s office and the New York Police Department.

Although Tevel’s indictment is sealed, Lt. Lincoln Hoshino, a spokesman for the Beverly Hills Police Department, told the Journal that the arrest warrant his department received from New York charges Tevel with three counts of criminal sexual acts in the first degree, five counts of criminal sexual acts in the third degree and three counts of sexual abuse in the first degree.

Tevel, 30, is currently being held without bail at Los Angeles County’s inmate reception center in downtown L.A.. He is scheduled for an extradition hearing as early as the morning of Thursday, Oct. 31, during which he can either fight the Brooklyn DA’s extradition request, or waive opposition to it, giving New York law enforcement officials 30 days to transport him to Brooklyn to be arraigned.

To read more please Click Here

 

 

Jacksonville FL — Chabad Lubavitch of Northeast Florida Chabad Shliach allows sex offender in Shul and Cheder.

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Update 11/1/2013: After talking with a source in Jacksonville, He informed JCW that as soon as the other shliach’s became aware that this man was on the sexual offender list they immediately warned him to stay away from the cheder and has not been there since. He however does help and work for Rabbi Kahanovs Chabad House.

They are in the process of having him removed.

Update 10/31/2013:  Mr. Pashkin  was seen around and in the cheder when it was on Rabbi K’s premises [not at the current location]   (Cheder and Shul are in two separate locations until it is moved back to rabbi Kahanov’s Premises)

Recently, it came to the attention of JCW that a registered sex offender (Michael Phillip Pashkin) has been attending the Jacksonville Chabad shul.

Mr. Pashkin was convicted of F.S. Code § 794.011(2), sexual battery with a victim under 12.

”The conviction was of section 2 of the Florida statute which states: “(2)(a)A person 18 years of age or older who commits sexual battery upon, or in an attempt to commit sexual battery injures the sexual organs of, a person less than 12 years of age commits a capital felony, punishable as provided in ss. 775.082 and 921.141.
(b)A person less than 18 years of age who commits sexual battery upon, or in an attempt to commit sexual battery injures the sexual organs of, a person less than 12 years of age commits a life felony, punishable as provided in s. 775.082, s. 775.083, s. 775.084, or s. 794.0115.” Which means the victim was less than 12 years of age and the victim’s sexual organs were injured.

He was sentenced to 12 years in prison. In 2010, he violated the conditions of his release and was sentenced to serve an additional 1 year 9 months. He was released in early 2012.

The Chabad Rabbi, Rabbi Yosef Kahanov, is and has been aware that Mr. Pashkin is a registered sex offender. Despite this registration, and the severity of the crime, Rabbi Kahanov has allowed this person into his community. He has chosen to ignore the safety of the children of his community and we believe he has not warned his community.

In an effort to ensure the communities safety, JCW reached out to discuss this matter with Rabbi Kahanov.  Rabbi Yoseph Kahanov confirmed that he knew this person was attending his community. In response to questions about why he was allowing a predator into his community, Rabbi Kahanov responded that we should keep Crown Heights issues confined to Crown Heights and Jacksonville to Jacksonville.

When asked if the community was warned or made aware that a sexual predator was in the community and attending his shul, he responded that he has no obligation to answer that.

Please contact Rabbi Kahanov and mandate the safety of your community by demanding the removal of a registered sex offender from your midst.

 

Chabad of Northeast Florida
10129 Haley Rd
Jacksonville Florida 32257
904-262-6641
Rabbi Yoseph Kahanov

If you have seen this man violate his probation by being involved with children in any way,please contact your local police department or contact us at info@jewishcommunitywatch.com

 

Paskin Sex Offenderhttp://offender.fdle.state.fl.us

 

 

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